There are lifetimes when the soul mates don't find each other. They look and they look, often thinking "this is the person, this is who I've been looking for," only to find later that they were wrong. In many ways, these lifetimes can be filled with loneliness and sorrow. Sometimes, the inability to find the soul mate does not cause the person to have a sorrow-filled lifetime however, it just misses that special spark that the soul mate gives it.

On first look, one might often think that finding ones soul mate is equivalent to "And they lived Happily Ever After" which of course is not always the case. The soul mates will love each other deeply, will have the karmic connection that just doesn't quit, they'll know each other more thoroughly sometimes than they know themselves, but they are not necessarily going to have an automatic, "happily ever after scenario".

Dr. Mark Pitstick, M.A., D.C. has more than 30 years experience and training working with people in hospitals, mental health centers, pastoral counseling settings, and holistic private practice. He is a certified past life regression therapy and a many-time published author has done extensive research into past lives, relationships, and soul mates.

In his years of research and counseling he has pointed out a few things that may give one rise to rethink what it means to be with a soul mate. Pitstick agrees that there are those who believe that everything will flow effortlessly and peacefully with soul mates, however he says this may be true at different times depending on the agendas of the souls involved.

He states that the soul mate is often the one who can push our buttons the best and who can be the ones to drive us crazy at times. He points out that we need to work to improve our patience and understanding.

Another point he makes is the roles the soul mates may be playing in the various life times. In one lifetime the soul mates may be a mother and son. In the next, the roles are reversed. The son, who was so rebellious is now the mother and she has an agenda to work out. The importance of unresolved spiritual relationships cannot be stressed enough.

If the two soul mates are not able to reach out and locate in their past lives those memories and emotions that they had with each other, the roles they played and get some resolution in those areas, they could have a very rough time of it. The idea for smoothing out the past for the two soul mates can bring about a healing and allows the past to be let go of.

Pitstick says, "Don't be ‘held back' and experience a ‘hell' of lower quality living because of unresolved relationship issues. Serious spiritual seekers will make optimal relationships a priority. Love is the key and relationships provide a life long workshop for giving and receiving love. If persistent problems plague your relationships, consider the soul or karma aspects in addition to usual counseling considerations."

There are a number of methods in use today to locate past life memories and begin to resolve unresolved issues. There is past life regression (used most often by past life counselors), auditing (used by Scientologists), hypnotism (although this does not work for all who try it), there is even some discussion that one may be able to use remote viewing in this fashion.

It doesn't matter what method a person chooses to resolve past life conflicts with their soul mate as much as it matters that they work to locate those memories and emotions and resolve them.

There is a positive outcome to working in this area as far as Pitstick can see, "In a loving relationship, both persons have an appreciation for individual differences and needs. If problems surface, nourish the relationship, communicate often, and have patience. If, however, counseling and mutual efforts don't improve a chronically unhappy and unrewarding relationship -move on. Life is for loving; too many have wasted their lives ‘sticking it out.'"

© TheosEra.com Spiritual Community 2008